From yourself.

Submitted by jenny on Sun, 05/06/2012 - 05:57

 

  1. No dream.  First: Consider again that proverb: “Where there is no vision, the people perish.”  What does it mean…and for you, personally?  What does “perish” mean?  (Perhaps it has a symbolic, and not a literal meaning.)  If you have a dream, can you express, define, and timetable it on paper?  (As teachers like to say, can you “operationalize” it?)  If you have a dream but cannot put it into words, how will you do so?  If you say you have no dream, what is it that is driving you now?  If you have no dream, where will you go?  If you had a dream, what happened?  It really does help if you have a dream, to attract you out of apathy or darkness, to inspire you on in work and in leisure, and to goad you through laziness and depression.  Second: leave your home, your work-site, your friends and go into the desert, the hills—at least, somewhere quiet.  Turn off your cell phone!  Try to think where it is you want to be, what it is you want to be doing, and note your thoughts on paper.  For me, some very important factors are “lifestyle” and “location”; that is, “How shall I live?” and “Where shall I live?”  Most people have their own criterion, as I have mine.  Let your heart speak out to you.  Record what you hear or feel; you can analyze it later.  Third: if you do not like this way, then you can follow your own way.  Anyway, find out what is driving you. 
  2. Confusion over goals.  Have you written down your goals?  Are they consistent with each other, or are they divided?  Do you understand what underlying motivations exist in you, driving your goals? Is English something you really find interesting (the end), or is it just a stepping-stone to something else (the means)?  Are you goals clearly and sequentially laid out in a “First-Then-Next-After that-Finally” order?  Are they (reasonably) attainable?  Can you endure/afford them?  Do you really want them, or are you being “driven”?  Just asking….
  3. Unsure where to begin.  If your dream, goals, plan, timetable have been written down, and they are all reasonably realistic, then put it into practice, step by step, bit by bit, according to the resources and available time that your situation in life has given you.  Perhaps you will feel less harried and more relaxed, and you will enjoy the journey more if you refuse to allow circumstance, demands and others to direct you.  Instead, you call the shots; you decide what you will do and when you will do it. 
  4. No feedback from colleagues.  If you are not getting feedback from them, don’t be surprised.  Many times they represent the forces of apathy, inertia, competition, opposition.  So, don’t look for feedback from them.  Go outside.  Remember (again)—those people who help you or direct you should not know each other, or even know about each other.  Why?  If something ever goes wrong, you don’t want your entire support network “compromised” in a day.  Who you go to depends on you, but if possible, isolate such people from your “circle” of colleagues—and maybe even your “circle” of classmates. 
  5. No one cares.  Expect this.  Unfortunately, it is part of life.  Do not wait for some “fairy godmother” figure to come down and help you.  Instead, try and help someone yourself.  I believe there is a “fuzzy” connection between helping others, and being helped oneself.  Certainly, do not go about looking for “care” from your workmates! 
  6. Worries about your reputation. If you worry about this, you will be paralyzed by fear or pride.  Remember, this is one of the tools or weapons that the “greater society” uses to control and homogenize its individual members.  There are two ways to deal with this problem: you choose.  Either you declare war on public opinion and do everything you please; expect conflict, and be strong and valiant when the “turkeys” come out looking for you.  Or, you go underground and act in secret; expect a lonely and dark journey, and design a system that cannot be penetrated from within or without. 
  7. Worries about income, rent, food.  Plainly, this is a concern for all of us.  We have to bring in the bread.  Try to economize wherever possible—both in terms of money and time.  Avoid debt, as well as an overly high standard of living; this will help you to allocate more of your resources to your real objectives—learning English on the go, on your own, where there is no foreign helper.  It is all a matter of priorities. 
  8. Fatigue.  Don’t kill yourself trying to do “too much”—just do “much”.  Manage your time and your sleep in a way that maximizes your productivity and protects your mental peace of mind.  In short, be hard working and diligent, but not crazy and suicidal in your efforts.  The aim is to succeed, not die.  Cut out those unnecessary activities, so you can have more time to sleep, or more time to do your work.  Consider using “ten-minute cat-naps” as a strategic tool…to maximize your performance over those long hours of study.  Do the same with snacks/water and exercise, if your body requires it. 
  9. Despair.  This will come into your life.  (As with everything written in this book, these ideas are only the tip of the iceberg—you can delete or add to them from your own experience.)  First: take a nap, or go to bed early that day.  “When in doubt, get horizontal.”  If possible, step back from the problem, let the dust settle down, and try to analyze your way out of the problem.  Give your despair a face, a name, a shape, a source—a connection with something concrete and visible—and then, start chipping away once more.  You now have something real and visible to confront openly, to work around, or even to run away from. Do not fear the word “coward”—you are merely regrouping, so as to kill the problem the next day. Don’t let time and deadlines, tasks and obligations drive you frantic or make you despairing!  Remember: You manage time, not the other way around. If you don’t finish it today, do so tomorrow. If you fail the exam this year, pass it next year. Sometimes despair comes because you allow your plans and your timetable to escape out of your control, like a bird escaping out of your hands. Second: If your despair comes as a result of a “crisis of motivation”, stop, rest, then lay everything “on the table”; have a long and honest time of self-examination (not “self-criticism”!), and make adjustments. Third: If someone has hurt, let down or betrayed you, let go, rest, heal, regroup, and go on, if possible. It is because of times and people like this that you isolate your friends and sources from each other—so the damage is localized. In summary, once you have calmed down, try to manage the forces of despair, and then kill them.  .
  10. No plan. Once again: “Failing to plan is planning to fail.” Conceive and write plans for everything you do—each day, month, year, minor or major project, and book. Time-link your plans, so you can know what time span you should complete them within. Make sure your objectives can be measured in terms of behavior and are not some abstract concept that cannot be measured or counted. (For example, do not say, “To understand [the old English epic poem] Beowulf”. Rather, say, “To recount the main idea and plot of Beowulf at the 80% accuracy level.”) Thus, you can measure the results of what you set out to do. Use a planning system that works and is effective for you; only ensure that the results of your objectives are measurable (i.e., they can be counted or quantified). Finally, having a plan will help you to sort out and throw away those things that are really a waste of time. It is amazing how much rubbish tries to masquerade as something useful!
  11. No interest in English outside of your job. If this describes you, then there are some very significant implications for you. Do you wish to develop your English or just keep your job? Do you wish to develop your English or just find a better paying job? Do you wish to develop your English or just –(you fill in the blank, here)? All this is O.K.; just make sure you have a clear set of goals and well-written plans. Then you can navigate successfully.
  12. Remain in your job because there is nowhere else to go. You can look at this in at least two ways. First, there is nowhere else to go (you are trapped).  Second, you can leave and go somewhere else (you are free). If you believe the first, do what you must to preserve your job, and vigorously guard your free time when you come home each evening. Unplug your telephone, eat your dinner quickly, and jump into your English books! Lead two lives, and enjoy them both. If you believe the second, then step out! Assume the risks, endure suffering, and collect glory. Whether you step away from your former job for an uncertain adventure overseas or in Shanghai, or whether you take a poorly paid job teaching English to little children in the hill-country of Guangxi or the salt-pans of Qinghai, the way you have chosen is glorious, because you are following your own heart. If this (or something else) is what you want to be, then be! If this is where you want to go, then go! If this is what you want to do, then do! Just remember this: do these things after graduation, and before you marry and the first baby arrives (i.e., between age 21 and 27). There may never be another time of freedom and opportunity as this!!! In summary, for both cases, do not think in terms of “nowhere else to go”. There is everywhere to go.
  13. Lose interest in English. Want something else? If it is possible, then change. Why be miserable? Unhappiness also has a powerful negative effect on “second language competence” (i.e., your English). Just be careful; don’t fall through the cracks into poverty.
  14. Why bother?  No motivation.  In this case, go and talk with a close friend: you need help. Your first job is to protect your job and stabilize it. Then consider English; put it in its right perspective. This crisis will not be solved in an afternoon. This is when you look for “social capital” from your friends, and get help.
  15. On burnout.  If you have burnout, then get onto the Internet and search for articles on “burnout”. Educate yourself, and take the necessary steps. If you catch burnout early, then it is easier to deal with. Left too late, it is much harder to “cure”. How much and how well you bring creative change into your life plays an important role in how you overcome burnout.